Consistency
When we think of consistency, we think of going to the gym every day for six months. Or eating the same meals to get a six-pack. Or studying for a set number of hours every day, no matter what. We wouldn’t be wrong in most cases. There is great benefit in doing the same thing over and over.
But what happens when we miss a day? What happens when we slip up out of laziness, stress, or frustration? When we set out to change our habits or our circumstances, it’s common to beat ourselves up. We beat ourselves up for not being who we think we should be, and then we beat ourselves up again when we inevitably fail at trying to change who we are.
In my martial arts journey, I approached learning like a perfectionist. I trained no matter how injured, tired, or uninterested I was. For a while, that worked. But with every hard pace, there is an even harder crash. I found myself getting hurt more often and reached a plateau in my training that I couldn’t seem to shake.
I wouldn’t find the answer to my dilemma until I started learning Japanese. Without a teacher, I had to teach myself not just how to speak, listen, read, or write, but how to learn as well. At first, I tried to mimic my approach to martial arts. I tried to plow through the problem with sheer determination. But I ran into the same obstacle I always had: my progress stalled, and I stopped enjoying myself.
Instead of pushing through in the same bullish fashion, I stepped back, lowered the bar, and changed my approach. I decided that if I could do something—anything related to the Japanese language—then I would count it as a victory. I could watch my favorite shows, listen to music I liked, and read books that caught my interest, as long as they fit the original goal.
Over the course of six months, I saw a massive difference. Learning became fun. It stopped being something I did and became something I am.
The approach ended up helping my martial arts as well. Rather than forcing myself to adhere to the same exact training regimen and calling it discipline, I worked with the grain of my nature instead of against it.
In the end, it means redefining consistency. We find what some of my teachers call the Middle Path, where you’re not stubbornly ignoring signals to change or giving up when things get tough. Consistency becomes about continually returning to the same subject day after day and with renewed enthusiasm.